Well I could sleep forever

Subject:	fuck hr people
Time:	12:21 am.

i really hope that things are going to go the way i am planning. i hope that i am not fucked. i will know soon. either %100 awesome or 90% very very irritatingly bad.

i am listening to very weird music right now. well, actually, at this very second im listening to the new pornographers. but the rest of what ive been listening to for the past hour has been rather unusual.

i forget that i am incredibley awesome when i am at work. i take a little bit of time off and tons of work comes in and i go oh no! look at all these jobs, how will i ever finish in time? and then i do. with no problem. days ahead of schedule. because i am awesome and i dont know how to pace myself.

i want someone to come tell me what the rules are so i know what i can get away with.

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Subject:	break the bubble, break it up
Time:	11:22 pm.
Mood:	crazy.
Music:	jethro tull - aqualung.

sometimes i just want to stop talking. just to see what it's like.
i could just never open my mouth again, to communicate i would have to perfect the subtle nuances of expression and mannerisms, and if you couldn't figure me out, i would just be a big mystery.
i don't really talk a lot at work. i don't have time, my job does not require direct contact with anyone else. but not talking except for at lunchtime doesn't really make me feel mysterious, i feel like it just inhibits my getting to know my coworkers. not that i want to be bffs or anything. things are cool enough as they are i suppose.
it also doesn't mean i don't take shit for having a rare conversation that actually lasts more than three responses from each party involved.

i definitely talk a lot around certain people, don't get me wrong. but i always feel like i could talk less.

i just want things to be as completely and utterly uncomplicated as possible.

not that things are terribly complicated.

there are just certain people that i will never really get to know, because i refuse it. i feel like i can be almost an OVERLY friendly person if i want to. if i want you to be my friend i make you my friend. if i don't, then it's your turn.

im glad that no one this is slightly in reference to will probably ever read this. as much as i think i talk a lot there are certain things i would NEVER say in front of people. everybody knows that!

in other news, my morning routine has rutted itself deep into the ground in a way that makes me think i will never dig myself out - my MOVEMENTS are the same, EVERY morning. it's because i sleep in too late. i don't leave myself time to make mistakes, so i have to do the same thing every morning to get myself out the door. it's just too early. i'm so tired of being tired all the time! are caffiene pills bad for you?

reading back over this makes me want to erase it, because i said too much without talking. but i won't erase anything. i'll post it and then make myself forget about it like i do with myspace, then whenever i feel like it, maybe i'll go back over and edit stuff out. i really have to not obsess about stuff that goes on the internet or else i'll never get it off my mind.

Bon Jovi, Def Leppard, and Scorpians = ultra secret secret secret guitly pleasure in ways no one can imagine. And Whitesnake. If my hair would hold a crimp I would totally get a sweet headband and rock myself into oblivion. In my mind at least.

Would it not be an amazing sight to see a white girl like me pumping pour some sugar on me through my car speakers as i drove through the suburbs in my cute little star tank tops? i might do that sometime just to shake people up a little bit. i would love to be That Girl.

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Subject:	we do it good
Time:	8:44 pm.

i just got my dirty grubby fingerprints all over age's computer screen, ha ha ha.

WORK SUCKS. but at the same time is very okay. im considering asking for a raise? which i think i deserve? but being doubleteamed by two bosses who insist on making all decisions (especially those regarding money) is tricky becauase im sure for every reason i have why i deserve one they'll come up with another for why they dont feel its "necessary." i cant wait until i work for me.

i want some cookies. chocolate chip ones.

they dont! its true! im not lying!

iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii just want to bang on my drum all day

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Subject:	You wreck me, baby
Time:	3:55 pm.

Holy crap, is it July already? Where did June go? I think one of the things I absolutely miss most about being in school is that your summer vacation has a specific start and end date, and all you have to do is pack as much fun as you can between those two dates. Me, right now? I work full time. I don't have a summer. Summer to me now means blasting fans all around me to push the hot air around because my building doesn't have air conditioning. I did buy some nice sunglasses the other day though, which is killer because I really needed some.

Tomorrow is Jeremy's birthday. He'll be 24. One of the things I got for him is a t-shirt I ordered online from this site where you can put any phrase you want on the type of shirt of your choice. It came in the mail after like three days, I'm so happy I took care of this already. Anyway, I chose the ringer type shirt, with blue rings around the collar and sleeves, and the front says "You are not the boss of me," in all caps which is what Jeremy told his kindergarten teacher when he was five, and then on the back is has this sort of retro line illustration, the kind of style they put on posters and things with lists of why beer is so great, and it's a man and a woman and the man is giving a thumbs up. I thought it put the phrase on the front into a nice context. And it was only $23! Awesome.

My nails on my left hand are growing allllmost to the point of hindering my typing skills.

Ooooh, there's a full moon tonight, that's exciting. Jeremy and I will be in Baltimore to see Rodrigo y Gabriela play at Ram's Head. It should be a pretty awesome show.

Hehehe, I was at Roy's the other night and he was talking to me through the window of my car as I was going to leave, and he heard my music, and I had to tell him that I have a soft yet rockin spot in my heart for Bon Jovi. There's no getting around it. It's so good. Also select Scorpians songs as well. He asked me to make a mix for him of Bon Jovi and Kansas and Thriller-era Michael Jackson and all the other awesome stuff I am secretly in love with.

You also can't go wrong with CCR. I love it. It makes me sad that I started paying attention to music in the late 90s, and that's what I initially thought was good.

MESSAGE TO SMITHY: I WANT TO GO TO THE BEACH. In all seriousness. Pick a day, any day!

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Time:

5:05 pm.

woah guys
do i throw a killer party or do i throw a killer party
there were teryaki chicken pineapple kabobs. and live music. and ping pong. and a thunderstorm. and people jumping in the pool in lieu of the thunderstorm. and too much tequila. and burgers. and everyone being their usual awesome selves.
and the best part, is that nobody broke anything, and my house was clean again by this morning. awesome.
now its mothers day. we got jeremys mom an azalea bush that can be planted outside thats shes super excited about, and a card of course, and for my mom a little red sweetheart rose bush that can also be planted outside, and a card. and i got to hold a baby again today.
haha, i just remembered the new words that got invented yesterday. like "perduper." which is always to the maxx, so it has the word "so" in front of it. so perduper!
maybe today ill fly my new kite.

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Time:	3:58 pm.
Music:	James Brown.

Passover
Songs
Wine
Ginger chicken
Daffodils
James Brown
A dentist appointment
Crayons
PJ
Cherry tomatoes
Potato soup
Hugs
Guitar
Paper plates
Keys
Olive oil
Fresh air
Greeeen grass
Hershey bars
Emails
Fishies

That's kind of what's going on at this general moment.

I went to the dentist today and I have an exposed root, not a cavity, which is what's been bothering me when I eat chocolate on the right side of my mouth. But I have a prescription for flouride, which I think is the coolest prescription ever, and means I'll probably never get another cavity ever again as long as I use it, which judging by the exposed state of my root, will probably be forever.

We've been having parties like every single weekend. Excluding that one, hah, but it's okay. I want to keep going! I know Smithy wants to drink drinks!

I like Passover. It's fun. Especially last night when we had chocolate mousse covered with blueberries and raspberries for dessert- OMG, it was amazing. Ohhh Emmm Geee. I could eat myself sick on berries. And chocolate. But it's a lot more fun to eat oneself sick on fruit.

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Subject:	Keep that going....
Time:	9:47 pm.
Music:	Secret Machines - Lightning Blue Eyes.

I can't say I had a very good day today. Not that anything particularly bad happened, I just had a series of moments where I thought "Man, I'm kind of an idiot..."

On the other hand, Britney Spears is still crazy, Paris Hilton still has herpes, and Anna Nicole is dead. Not that someone being dead makes me happy in any way. But man, if it HAD to be someone, I'm GLAD it was her.

One good thing that happened today was I DID get a raise. Not a huge raise, but a satisfactory raise nontheless. Even though I kind of hate thinking about my job because.....well.....when I think about it one way, I want to be there for a long time. I want to know everything, and have all that experience, and keep getting more raises, and it's not like Colourworks is the kind of place that hires and fires all the time. They want me to be there a long time, too. But on the other hand....it's SO STRANGE to think of getting up EVERY MORNING and going to the SAME PLACE and doing the SAME WORK for....years! Albeit, it's pretty interesting work, I get to see some crazy shit sometimes that I'm not really supposed to see, and some of it is fun enough, but still....I don't want a CAREER right now. I want to goof off and not take anything seriously and be young while I still can. You don't think about how young you are when you actually are young, like high school and younger, but then as soon as you're out you're like OH SHIT, life happens to fast.

But at the same time, I did just sell out and make a facebook, not that there's anyone on here who I probably haven't found already, and I'm frustrated that that ISN'T moving fast enough. But I know that's silly and it's okay.

I don't WANT to go to work tomorrow. I want it to be the weekend already. I want to sleep all day and party all night. I don't want ANYONE to tell me what to do.

I go in to work at least 10 to 15 minutes late every day. That's not stolen from Office Space, I actually do that. I seriously CAN NOT make myself get up in time to be there any earlier. Having to be someplace at 9 every morning is just killer. I don't understand how people do it for their entire lifetimes. I'm not SUPPOSED to work for somebody, I'm SUPPOSED to be an ARTIST. Grr.

Even though I do get to see people's vacations to Disneyworld and penguins and dogs running around and cool falling down buildings and dead bodies when the police account comes in. Not that I actually look at the dead bodies, but it's still cool. And scary. Don't get me wrong.

WE HAD A PARTY LAST WEEKEND AND WE'RE HAVING A PARTY THIS WEEKEND AND I WANT TO HAVE A PARTY NEXT WEEKEND TOO!!! AND I WANT TO WATCH MOVIES ALL NIGHT AND SLEEP IN!!!

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Time:	1:49 am.
Music:	the decemberists - summersong.

i love the decemberists
amazing
i love my job
super amazing
i drove to dc with my mom today and hung out with my dad before and after watching his play
super awesome amazing
im going to visit smithy tomorrow
super awesome totally amazing
having a long day makes me want to take a shower
not so amazing

i no longer feel like im walking on a plank of wood, and one wrong step or push in one direction could send me over the edge. now i kind of feel like im floating on a piece of wood on water, and im okay, but nothing majorly bad had better happen to me or else i might sink. and by the way, the wood is a total metaphor for money. thats it.

this idea keeps running through my head, an idea for a story i may write, except its totally alice in wonderland trippy, and i need to stop coming up with cool moments and details and think of some actual plot!

summer burns away
and quietly gets swallowed by the wave

im so tired all the time. i need to get more sleep. the hardest thing about work is sometimes im so tired i almost fall asleep sitting up. that doesnt happen very much, but when it does it teh uber SUCKS.

people keep calling me sweetheart lately. that and kiddo. i also continually see falling objects. more on that later.

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Time:

12:02 am.

dear livejournal,
i forgot about you, and then i remembered. but you have made my friends page very limited, and when i get to the bottom thats it, and i dont like that, i want to be able to see all the posts my friends have made. thats very lame of you. but anyway, i just wanted you to know im still around, im doing well, i have a great new job and things are pretty cool. im totally excited about the holiday season because i can decorate and bake things and listen to christmas music and im actually working at a place this year that will have a real christmas party. even though by "christmas party" i really mean we all go to some restaraunt and get drunk. but that's all well and good. anyway, im going to go, and maybe ill be back soon, but im not making any promises.
love, reese

ps tell us when you are home for christmas break because age wants to have a christmas cocktail party but needs to know when people will be home so we can pick a good date.

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Time:	8:20 pm.
Mood:	crazy.
Music:	bad company - shooting star (and friends on tv).

this past week has been the closest ive ever been to actually being broke. like, literally, having NO money. the abject disintigration of my job could not have come at a worse time. i think there may be a small light at the end of my tunnel, and i dont know yet if its my saving grace, but i will find out shortly. i suppose by shortly i mean thursday, because thats about as much time as i have. however i have to keep in mind that even if the potential light saves my grace i still might not be out of the woods yet. to know if im out of the woods i have to wait until next month. and even if im out of the woods next month, im still under a mountain of bills and deep in a hole of debt. so i have to climb out of the hole which is under the mountain which is outside the woods at the end of the tunnel, and time is my only friend and also my worst enemy.

i think that pretty adequately describes where i am right now. ive been a bit preoccupied.

i suppose it might make me feel more productive if i go clean my kitchen. which i dont want to do. it hurts my neck to dip my head down like that and i might as well be at the bookstore if im going to suffer for that stance.

why are my lights blinking? okay, theyre not anymore. but thats bothers me.

theres a commercial for chocolate on and it just might break me. i might have to go buy some chocolate. i really really shouldnt. but i might. i think i will. just to make me feel better. wouldnt that be amazing if i got a job at the godiva store in the towson mall?!?! wouldnt it?!?! i think i might do that too! oh my god. me, in a chocolate store. oh. my. god. id get fat in no time.

i love these nights when they play three straight hours of friends. its so comforting. not that i sit in front of my tv for three straight hours, i just leave it on while i do other things.

seriously though, i dont smoke, i dont drink (a lot), i dont go shopping all the time or spend unnecessarily, i feel like if im going to be this poor i should at least have a vice that i spend all my money on! i should at least get to enjoy something like that! but i dont. in fact im unusually resposible and organized about my finances. i know exactly when something is too much and when i should say no, and i have to say no to myself all the time because we dont have any money to be spending. thats the problem. its not that we dont know how to pay our bills, its that we dont have MONEY. GRR. I HATE MONEY BECAUSE I HAVE NONE. though i should soon. not a terrible unusual lot, but hopefully enough.

okay! im going to go watch friends and clean my kitchen during commercials. and later go to the bookstore and buy some chocolate while im out. BECAUSE I WANT SOME CHOCOLATE, DAMMIT. ooh, chandler just got burned. haha.

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Subject:	go with the flow
Time:	8:40 pm.

so i was reading a magazine today, and there was an article about how cool and unlame it is to live by yourself and be on your own, because you learn how to take care of and entertain yourself and all that, and i came to the realization that i have absolutely NO living-alone skills. like, none. i really enjoy alone time, when i can do what i want, but most of the time i dont really do ANYTHING. i watch tv. i cruise the internet. i check my myspace. maybe if i have a little bit of energy ill do the dishes. but ultimately, my time is pretty much spent waiting for jeremy to come home. even though when he comes home i do all the things i do when im alone, just with his company. i mean, why cant i use this time to draw or write or do something constructive? i keep blaming my stupid apartment, which really isnt stupid at all, its quite a nice little apartment, but i keep telling myself its not a good enough space for me. when i have a better space ill be able to get my creative juices flowing. i actually thought of a really cool story book idea last night, maybe if i decide to write it out before i finish updating this you guys can tell me what you think. in the meantime.....its always strange when you realize something you've been blaming for your behavioral patterns is really innocent, and the problem becomes even bigger. someday im going to HAVE to learn to entertain myself.

in other news, things are rather uncertain about my job.....two of the stores my department supplied to decided to buy their own flowers directly from growers, which means nobody has to go in and cut flowers and make bouquets for them, which means i may be out of a job. they might be able to use me like, one day a week i suppose, for the other stores we supply but its less than half the work we were doing before. i'll just have to wait and see whether there's another position in the store they could use me for, because i really dont want to stop working at f&f! but i did drop off an application at ritz camera in towson before i even knew about this possibly getting laid off busines, just because i think it would be really cool to print pictures again. i want to have nothing to do with selling cameras, i just want to print peoples vacation pictures. wicked cool.

i wish so much that it was christmas....

i want it to be christmas, but i want to have money for christmas. im so sick of being broke!

alright well.....i dont really feel like typing out my story idea, because i just thought of it last night and im not even sure about it yet. i sort of go through phases with my ideas, where one night ill think its the cleverest thing ever, and then the next night ill think eh, maybe its not as great as i think it is.....so if you want to know, ask, and maybe ill tell you.

friends is almost over on tv. i might have to bust out my dvds. no. no more friends. actually, you know what movie ive been dying to watch recently? office space. i havent seen that movie in forever. okay, friends it is, but i have to find something else to do while i watch. i promise.

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Subject:	standanpy
Time:	7:39 pm.

colin farrell is officially the only man i have ever seen who can wear a handlebar mustache and still look incredibly sexy. mmmmm.
jeremy is sleeping and i am in need of attention and the internet is not fulfilling this purpose. but i suppose that can be construed as a good thing. but there should be at least one person at all times avaliable online to give me attention when jeremy is out of commission. i demand it.
ashley from work got cool fishies and Smithy got a puppy and I WANT FISHIES AND A PUPPY SO BAD and you'd think i'd be able to afford the fishies but right at this moment mmmm, not so much, but hopefully soon because that's pretty lame when you can't even spare a buck to buy a fish. where's jesus when i need him?
someday i will have a puppy though. ooooohhh, i cant wait.
i think i should go make some dinner.

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Subject:	why is it always midnight?
Time:	7:57 pm.

i really hope i can chalk this up to the pmsing right now.

jeremy has been driving himself absolutely insane with his shoulder and now his tooth pain, so he managed to make it until i came home from work today before we hauled it off to delaware to get his new prescription of vicodin. which means i had no time to chill out after i came home, which apparently is integral to me having a pleasant evening. being that i am in delaware, you'd think id have lots of things i want to do and people i want to see and there is a lot of that, except at the same time i dont want to do ANYTHING. so i've been sitting here since 6, screwed up my sudoku game because i was using a pen, listening to shrek 2 in the background and really really wishing i could be back home, which i will be in about 4 hours, just in time to go to bed. its really not that bad. i probably sound pretty miserable. well i am. except im not. because its not like anything bad happened. its not like someone died. im just so terribly, terribly bored and i want to be home because i'm just that lazy that i need at least a couple of consecutive hours in each of my days where i can sit there and do nothing if i want to. and right now i really REALLY want to.

im so lazy. why am i so lazy? because i want to live someplace else. philly. boston. california. thats it, really. but any of those places. NOT baltimore. when i live in one of those places ill be more motivated to do the things i like doing, and not sitting around playing sims. which is fun, but after you play a video game for four straight hours time feels really weird.

okay. something should be happening pretty soon. i hope. god please let something happen. something GOOD. but at least something.

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Time:	6:25 pm.
Music:	stadium arcadium.

how come livejournal only goes back like two pages of friends entries? surely there are some that ive missed that i guess are now lost and gone forever. oh well.

i guess im going to a show tonight....at the recher or somewhere. not sure. marc's other band. should be good times though.

speaking of shows, jeremy is going to the all good festival next weekend, and im not because i wouldnt get to shower for like four days and if i have to be a hippie i refuse to be a dirty one. so im working on friday and then going up to delaware for the ice cream festival....at least i get to go to a festival too. and i get margo time!

ive been so addicted to sims2 recently its like not even funny. ive had to do an intervention with myself, where i told myself, i said, "self, you play too much." and then i was like "but self, it's so fun!!" and my self said "i know, i know, but the kitchen is dirty and there is laundry to be done, and im tired of putting up with this stupid wheely chair that slides backwards because apparently my floor dips slightly." and self said "okay, well, we'll try it today, since we have to go to the show anyway, but it's not over." and self decided "that is acceptable. we'll take it slow."

sometimes you just gotta level with yourself.

oh yeah, one thing i did do today was i cleaned out my fridge, and i wont go into details but it was like the fucking apocalypse in there, and i made it better, and i had so much more room to put all the groceries we had just bought. i got blueberries and cucumbers and carrots and apples and orange juice and a honeydew melon and peaches and a banana which i ate in the car with lemonade. i spent like thirty dollars on fruits and vegetables. it was awesome.

i have to buy pots to put my viney things into!

hah, gosh, i almost forgot. THIS WEDNESDAY AT 10/9C IS THE SEASON PREMIER OF PROJECT RUNWAY SEASON 3!!!!! IM SO EXCITED!!!! WEDNESDAYS ARE MY TV NIGHTS AGAIN!!!!! OMG!!!

<3

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Subject:	this isnt really as bad as it sounds
Time:	12:14 am.
Mood:	exhausted.
Music:	stairway.

so jeremy went to college park and i didnt want to go because i wanted to relax and work on my drawing which i really wanted to have done by this weekend but i got caught up watching tv and the second half of the incredibles which is not a movie i can just put on in the background because its just so good but that means i couldnt work on my drawing which means its not done and its really late and i need to go to bed because i have to be at work at 8 tomorrow which i dont want to deal with but i have to keep working because my couple hundred bucks a week is really helpful especially right now because jeremy told off his boss and took a new job which he didnt even have to interview for, it was already offered to him, but he has to go to four days of unpaid training which sucks and my plan to get us completely financially stable which seemed so close will be put on hold for a little while, hopefully not too long, but long enough that the immediate future seems pretty uncertain, not in a bad way, i know we'll be okay, but my plan got screwed up and i have to come up with a new one and i wish i didnt feel like tonight was a waste, even though it was really nice to just chill, but there are so many things i want to do, like clean the bathroom and go shopping and do all the laundry and finish my damn drawing but i never get around to them because i feel like i have no energy after standing on my feet at work all day and i really want to work out and get in shape but i dont have any equipment and i dont want to go to the gym because id want to drag jeremy with me but theres no way he'd survive that because of his shoulder which sucks for both of us right now and its the best thing in the world that im not a pothead because if i was we'd have NO money and because of that i dont mind being the one who has to say no all the time even to myself, but sometimes i respect the wisdom in "life is suffering" because not being able to go shopping and do lots of things now will only make me appreciate being able to do them in the future when i know we'll be able to, i just wish i could do more for other people, but anyway i have to go to bed now even though i dont want to be finished with my day and jeremy isnt home yet but im already tired which means ill fall asleep soon after i go to bed and i really need to get sleep before tomorrow because its going to be a looooong weekend and i cant find enough chill music that i want to listen to right now to justify being up so i might as well go to bed and read for a while, im between three things by the way, singer to the gods, ghosts of vesuvius and my zits comic book, and then pass out and maybe tomorrow ill be able to figure out a plan because i tried doing that today and i was a complete failure and its weird making the discovery that i feel completely useless when i cant plan things out properly first.

not even zeppelin was chill enough tonight. i need like white noise or something. i just need to go to bed.

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Time:	1:49 pm.
Mood:	relaxed.
Music:	stevie ray vaughn - little wing.

last night i mentioned how i wished it was christmastime, because that's my favorite time of year, and i guess jeremy was thinking about it because like an hour later, out of nowhere, he said "you know what would be cool, since we'll actually have money this christmas we should drive up to new york and see the nutcracker on broadway." and i was like EEEEEEE! i've ALWAYS wanted to go to new york and window shop at christmastime, and seeing the nutcracker sounds amazing! jeremy is the best EVER.
i have today and tomorrow off, and my two goals are to clean my bathroom and finish my billie holiday ink drawing. at least one of those two things has GOT to happen. well, really both of them should happen, but i REALLY don't feel like cleaning my bathroom. billie has to happen no matter what. she has a deadline. the bathroom may or may not happen. depends on if i can get some more mikes hard. mmmm. oooh, and i have a plant that needs potting too. i love my plants.
last night i had this craaaazy dream where dorian and lizz, two teachers from dcad (lizz was my english teacher and they moved away and teach at another school now, i think) owned this store with all these really really cool paintings and sculptures and things, but it was very needful things-esque, and i knew that if i bought something from them they would like, own my soul or something, so i didnt want to buy anything but then they invited me over to their house for dinner and for some reason i had to go, and when i was there (jeremy and my sisters were with me for some reason?) dorian and lizz were really super nice, but i knew they were just waiting for their moment when they could pressure me into buying something and then they'd own my soul.....it was not unlike my dream from a couple nights ago where david byrne was a cult leader and i was trapped in his mansion and he was really nice to me but i knew that if i tried to escape he'd punish me. creeeeepy. oh and the night before that i dreamed that jim morrison kissed me. heh.
i think today while i do stuff i may watch christmas cartoons. christmas cartoons are the best.
<3

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Time:

7:05 pm.

jeremys mom gave me some vines with leaves on them clipped off one of her plants, and today i planted one that rooted in a little pot. im waiting for the others to root too, and then i can have lots of little leafy viney plants around my apartment.
i also decided to clean my apartment today, since i dont have to work again til thursday (thank you sweet lord in heaven). i made it through my living room and most of my kitchen. i am satisfied.
oooh, i also bought a carving set the other day, and a couple blocks of wood, though theyre all rectangular. i wanted squarish ones. but its okay. im embracing the rectangularity of the long one by maing a totem pole. im not sure yet if i want to do "see no evil hear no evil speak no evil," or if i just want to do animal faces or something. oh yeah, and my other one is a weeping willow. its coming along. though i have to be careful because last night i was whittling for a while and then this morning i tried to write something and i realized it hurt my hand. so i try to be gentle with my knife. which seems like a good idea in itself.
ohhhh friends is on a monica and chandler have babiiiiies.....ooohh.....
k thats it.

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Subject:	save me as i save myself
Time:	11:04 pm.
Music:	cold (but im still here).

i love music.
i hate wasps.
i love kittens.
i hate being anxious.
i love jeremy.
i hate slime.
i love having plants.
i hate having no money.
i love final fantasy.
i hate having to pay bills.
i love having friends.
i hate cell phones.
i love sharpies.
i hate crayons.
i love chocolate.
i hate olives.
i love sleeping.
i hate being sick.
i love presents.
i hate late charges.
i love flowers.
i hate standing all day.
i love getting paid.
i hate paying taxes.
i love rings.
i hate dust bunnies.
i love drawing.
i hate feeling alone.
i love learning.
i hate really spicy foods.
i love being skinny.
i hate biting my nails.
i love attention.
i hate being blamed.
i love the internet.
i hate destroying the earth.
i love air.

i am also mildly indifferent to hats.

Comments: Add Your Own.

Subject:	light my fire
Time:	11:45 pm.

fooooooooooodshopping

yummy

im reading no one here gets out alive, and im actually going to finish it this time, and i'm taking notes, and it might be leading to my next big idea. as soon as jeremy makes us enough money for me to stop working im going to make us millions of dollars.
im a renaissance woman.

kickass.

a priest and a rabbi walk into a bar, and the rabbi says "hey, did you hear the one about us?"
i love family guy.

i like crushing foil candy wrappings into tiny little balls. the smaller and tighter, the better.

*sigh*....i dont want to get up for work tomorrow. this is like hell week, mothers day = crazy. but crazy hours = money = happy reesee, so ill be working as much as i can. but that doesn't mean i like getting up in the mornings.

i am apprehensive.....and yet strangely optimistic.....about the near future. i just want it to be over. i mean, i wish right now was two months from now, just to know where ill be, and so i can escape the next couple weeks. not that theyll be bad. theyll just be the same.

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Time:	10:07 pm.
Music:	steppenwolf.

*sigh*
jeremy is watching shark week on the discovery channel. hes such a boy, its adorable.
screw you, t-mobile, i hate you. i hate all cell phone companies. ive never ever been satisfied with any of them. we're getting a home phone soon and my cell phone may be out of commission, because im tired of dealing with it. i dont like that i need it the way i need my left foot and i feel impaired without it. i need to cleanse myself of this addiction.
so im taking my story book so seriously and really working on it, im so going to knock it out and get it published and make thousands of dollars. that would be amazing. amaaaaazing.
oh oh oh, and theres this place called the Childrens Book Store in roland park and i went in there today for like five minutes while doing some deliveries for work and it was sooooo cute, and so inspiring and i want to go back tomorrow so i can look around at all the awesome childrens books they have. i noticed a shelf labelled "old favorites," and i really want to see what they have, thats the only thing i didnt get a good look at. but oh!
theres a guy that i work with who ive always been polite to but never really interacted with, and the other day he helped me mop up some water that had leaked and pooled around my desk, and i thanked him so much for it, and now hes really nice to me and he helps me out. the girl i work with thinks he helps me just to spite her because they dont get along, but its like well....maybe if you were nice to him, hed be nice to you too. it always surprises me what you dont know about people, and how cool they can be if you just treat them with a little respect.
i ate all jeremy red jellybeans. i never really liked jellybeans before, but i was in the mood for some fruity chewy candy and that was the best i could do. i dont like the orange ones though, so i had to pick through them, and i wound up eating all the red ones. oh well, they were yummy.
<3

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